Sunday, July 29, 2012

My first week.......

So I am starting this blog today, at 1:14 in the morning. I'll just be straightfoward.....I want to lose. I must lose. The weight must go. Away. For the rest of my life. I am documenting everything here on this blog, because I feel that by sharing with everyone to see, I am being held accountable. Let me start with my stats...ugh. Ok. Here goes. Currently, the last time I checked my weight, it was right at 180 lbs. I am 5 ft, 7 and 1/2 inches tall. I am fat. I know that I am fat, and I know that things need to change because I am miserable. I do not want to live the rest of my life feeling and looking like this. I hide under large T-shirts, and own no cute clothing because I am afraid to draw attention to my fat. I cannot even wear shorts above my knees anymore, because of the cellulite that sits on top of my knees. Yes, I am being very graphic, but hey, I said I was going to be telling you everything, right? I took a few pictures of myself last week, probably about 2 days after I started the Jillian Micheal's 30 Day Shred on Level 1, for the second time. I never made it to day 30 the first time (got to maybe day 17 or so). Here are some pics:

So...........that's the fat me. The me that needs a change. I was not always fat. Growing up, I never was super skinny, but never fat either. Just thick, I guess. Then at age 29 I had a baby, and my body completely changed. And now here I am, almost 2 years later at age 30, going on 31. So here is my plan. It may change as time goes on, but basically here is an outline of what I am planning on doing to change my body back into something that I am not ashamed of. For 30 days straight, I want to do the Jillian Michaels 30 Day shred 20 minute workout video, on level 1. I started this last Sunday, July 22. I had meant to start this blog around that time, but band camp took precedence. (My hubby is a band director, and so am I).  I like theJillian Micheal's 30 Day Shred   video, because I need nothing more than Dumbbells  and a T.V. I can do this workout in my living room, and do not have to worry about getting myself to the gym, securing a babysitter, etc. Its just very convenient. Its also cute to watch my son as he mimics the exercise moves I am doing. And it sets a good example for him also. After 30 days on level 1 of Jillian Micheal's 30 Day Shred, I plan to do another 30 days on level 2. After completing month 1 on level 1, and month 2 on level 2, I plan on doing month 3 on level 3. I know, it sounds crazy. And you are probably thinking I will get bored with each level by doing it so many days. And you may be right. That's why I said my plans may change. My plan is to be back down to 145 lbs (which I WAS about 5 years ago) by my 31st birthday, which will be on November 10, 2012. And then I intend to stay that way, and not gain the weight back. That will be a challenge, but I think having this blog will definitely help keep me active and accountable. Anyways, here are a few pics, taken about 3 weeks ago of me holding my son, the day before my husband and I went on a cruise...



Yes, I am fully aware of how terrible I look in these pics, lol. I had no makeup on, and of course I am fat. I am also crying because I am about to say goodbye to our son for a week (he stayed with his grandparents while my hubby and I cruised). It was my first time away from him for more than 1 night. Here is a picture taken that same day of me and my grandparents:
Wow, I look like an amazon woman! I hate seeing the fat rolls hanging over my size 14 shorts and my HUGE gigantic flabby white arms. How did I ever let it get to this point? 

Now is the time for change. Now is the time to suck it up and just do it. In addition to the exercise routine daily, I plan on cutting back on my portion sizes. No more second helpings! I am always miserable after second helpings, but I continue to do it anyways. Why? No more. Its time for a change. I also plan to try to stick to healthier foods such as turkey meat, boneless skinless chicken breast, wheat bread instead of white, and no sugary drinks or juices. Yes, I do enjoy unsweet tea with artificial sweetner though. I know, I know, it causes cancer and makes you crave sugar, blah blah blah. But I am not ready to cut it out just yet, and may never. It has NO calories, so don't judge me, lol. I also intend to drink 8 full glasses of water a day. Or maybe a whole gallon. I know I need to drink more water. And I am going to treat this blog like a personal diary, or log of my adventures, problems, and progress.

 Ok, one more fat picture before I go....lol.


This is my husband, our almost 2 yr son, and our 'adopted' almost 19 year old daughter whom we took into our home as our own. Ok, well that is all for today (or this morning should I say). See you next time!